


Feels Like

by Merrov



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: First Time, M/M, Post Season 6
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-10-18
Updated: 2010-10-18
Packaged: 2017-10-12 18:19:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/127707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Merrov/pseuds/Merrov
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He never realized how stiffly Jack held himself around them. Seeing him like this stirred up images in Daniel's mind; fuzzy memories of sitting on a couch, sipping a beer and watching Jack go nuts over a hockey game on the TV. Daniel was surprised to feel his chest tighten at the image. There was a certain… fondness… that the memory invoked.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Feels Like

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Redd (nophoenix) for the 2010 Jack/Daniel Ficathon. Redd wanted 1. Ocean, 2. First time, with the option of post-Decention. Hope you like it! Huge thanks to melayneseahawk for the extension and for organizing this!  
> In just under the wire means no beta besides myself.
> 
> Disclaimer: If I owned Stargate, it wouldn't be suitable for general consumption!

It started- again, for Daniel- with the ocean on P7Z-418.

He didn't know why Colonel Jack O'Neill wanted to use his weekend leave to take him off-world, or why this particular planet. He couldn't even explain why Major Carter or the Jaffa, Teal'c, his name was, weren't invited. Apparently they'd been there before. The file said that while P7Z-418 was a nice planet- the Stargate was right above a red sandy beach and a beautiful azure ocean- there was nothing of value found there. It was uninhabited, had no useful raw materials, no ruins, and no Goa'uld presence.

Colonel ("Just call me Jack already, would ya?") O'Neill wasn't even in the gear-up room when Daniel was getting ready for their excursion. He'd been shown how to dress for off-world travel, but this was the first time he was doing so alone. Ever since SG-1 had brought him back to Earth, he'd had Carter or Teal'c with him at nearly all times. The Colonel had pretty much avoided him. Daniel still had no idea why. Asking Carter about it only got him a shrug and an assurance that it was probably 'just a Jack thing. He'll come around.'

Now Daniel was expected to stay off-world with Colonel O'Neill as his only company for three days? General Hammond had approved it after O'Neill said that 'it'd do Daniel some good to get out from under this rock and see some sun. Maybe if he's back out there again he'll have a better time remembering everything.' Daniel wasn't sure of the Colonel's logic, but after being stuck inside the mountain for three weeks, he certainly wasn't going to say no.

Shrugging on the final bit of gear, Daniel shuffled out of the gear-up room and down the hall towards the Stargate. He could hear the thing clanking along as someone called out chevrons over the intercom. O'Neill was in the embarkation room, not so patiently waiting. Daniel paused in the doorway and cleaned his glasses, just to make the Colonel wait a little longer.

The planet was just as pretty as the file said it was. "Nope, nothing's coming to me," Daniel said as he peered around from the foot of the gate platform.

"Come on, Daniel, we just got here. Let's get camp set up, and look around a bit." O'Neill seemed to be edging at something, but Daniel couldn't be sure. He didn't know the colonel well. Maybe that was the problem. He'd been a member of O'Neill's team for five years before he ascended. Everyone on the base knew him and expected him to act and be a certain way. Daniel wasn't sure he was living up to their expectations.

"Colonel, I'm not sure what you think-"

O'Neill turned and waved his hand at Daniel. "Jack, Daniel. Call me Jack. Hearing you call me Colonel makes me feel… old." He turned back around and left Daniel still standing near the gate.

Daniel sighed. This could turn out to be a long weekend.

oOo

Sitting on the beach after setting up camp, Daniel looked out across the water. The planet was completely fresh, spoiled only if Daniel looked to his left to where O'Neill was dipping his toes into the surf. Something about how at ease the colonel, _Jack,_ Daniel reminded himself, looked made Daniel pause. He'd never seen him away from their team mates in a situation like this. He never realized how stiffly Jack held himself around them. Seeing him like this stirred up images in Daniel's mind; fuzzy memories of sitting on a couch, sipping a beer and watching Jack go nuts over a hockey game on the TV. Daniel was surprised to feel his chest tighten at the image. There was a certain… fondness… that the memory invoked.

When Jack looked his way, Daniel kept studying him, trying to categorize this new feeling with everything he thought he knew about the colonel. Jack sloshed through the surf to come sit next to him. "Daniel?" he prompted.

"Jack?" Daniel replied automatically. For some reason, it made Jack grin.

"How ya feeling?" Jack asked.

Daniel shrugged and turned to stare out at the water again. "I'm not sure. I remembered something." Jack didn't reply, but Daniel felt him straighten a little, waiting. "We were in a house. I think it was yours. You were yelling at the TV and there was a game on."

"Hockey?" Jack asked. Daniel nodded. "What were you doing?" Jack asked carefully.

"Watching you," Daniel admitted, curious if Jack would explain the memory. If he could fit it into context with everything else he'd remembered so far, then it would be another puzzle piece in place.

Jack nodded and leaned back on his hands, looking up at the sky. "That wasn't long before you ascended," he said quietly.

Daniel waited for more, but Jack was silent after that. Finally Daniel stood up. "I'll go see about a fire."

There was something in the way Jack had spoken that told Daniel there was more to the story than he was letting on. He knew it was better to discover the memories on his own instead of having someone tell him, but this particular case was going to drive him nuts. Every time he tried to remember, he got a complete blank. Finally, Daniel gave up and focused on collecting firewood.

"There's a freshwater lake about a mile inland," Jack said over their dinner of MREs. "Think there's fish in there."

Daniel nodded and ate quietly. He was chasing that memory again, still with no success. Frustrated, he picked at his food. The memory was important, Daniel knew it. Something happened just after the part he remembered, something that Jack carefully didn't mention.

"Daniel? Are you even listening to me or are you off in your own little world again?" Jack asked.

Daniel looked up, suddenly aware that Jack had been talking for a while. "What? No, sorry, I wasn't listening."

Jack rolled his eyes. "Early to bed tonight, Danny. Tomorrow morning we're going fishing."

oOo

That night, Daniel dreamed. It was more an out of order sequence of images than any actual memory, but it all had to do with Jack. He was being tortured by Ba'al, and Daniel could do nothing to stop it because he was ascended. He saw the image of Jack, his shirt full of holes, laying on the floor of his cell in a daze. He saw the image over and over again, in between images of Jack poking at artifacts in Daniel's office, Jack standing over a barbeque in his back yard, Jack and Daniel in Daniel's apartment, in Jack's house, on Jack's couch, talking, drinking, arguing, laughing, kissing-

Daniel woke with a start, the feeling of Jack's hands on his face and their mouths pressed together slowly fading away as he looked around the darkness of their tent. Kissing? Jack? Was this what Daniel was trying to remember yesterday? Was this the reason why Jack had been so distant ever since Daniel had come back to Earth? Was he afraid Daniel wouldn't remember? Or was he afraid that Daniel would?

Daniel looked over at Jack's bedroll and found the other man watching him. "Daniel?" he questioned.

Daniel shook his head. "Dream," he answered, not yet willing to confront the colonel about his possible revelation.

Jack looked at his watch and sat up. "We might as well get up. We wanted an early start for fishing." Daniel couldn't remember agreeing to go fishing, but he got up anyway. He wasn't going to be able to sleep again.

oOo

Daniel had to admit, watching Jack lounge on a rock and casting into the water made him feel something. The affection he felt for this man was still an unexpected rush and it frustrated Daniel that he didn't have the memories to explain why. Daniel knew he'd had a wife. He knew Jack had been married as well. The memories of Charlie had recently come to light, too. As far as Daniel knew, neither of them had ever been attracted to men, but that image, that sensory memory of kissing Jack, was too real to have been simply a product of a dream.

"Daniel," Jack said slowly, bringing Daniel out of his thoughts. Jack was looking at him, eyebrow raised.

"Hm?" Daniel asked innocently.

"You're staring at me."

"Oh." Daniel shrugged. "Sorry."

"Just wondering what's going on in that brain of yours," Jack said, looking back at his line and slowly reeling it in.

Daniel wasn't sure how to talk about it. What if it was just a dream? Daniel wasn't sure how Jack would react to being asked if he was attracted to men. "Why did you bring me out here, Jack?"

Jack became very interested in casting his line. He watched it arch across the water, breaking ripples as it landed and sank. "Thought you'd like to get out of the mountain is all."

"But we could have stayed on Earth," Daniel reasoned. "There was no reason to go off world, was there? Sam and Teal'c have both taken me off base. They showed me around my old apartment. Just because I can't live off base yet doesn't mean I'm not allowed out."

"Daniel," Jack sighed. "Why do you have to analyze everything?"

Daniel blinked. "Because I don't know what's important yet. Besides, I was told that's pretty much what I do."

Jack grumbled under his breath and reeled in his line again. "Yeah, I guess that's true."

"Don't change the subject," Daniel watched Jack cast again. "Why did you bring me out here?"

"Because, Daniel, I wanted some time alone with you," Jack snapped. "I figured maybe, out here where there's no distractions, some things would come back."

Things like kissing you? Daniel wanted to ask, but the words wouldn't come out. Jack risked a glance at Daniel and found him still staring. He gave Daniel a look, then turned back to the water. "You've remembered something you're not saying," Jack observed quietly.

"I dreamed about you being tortured by Ba'al last night," Daniel answered. "And I also dreamed about a barbeque, an argument, and…" he trailed off, still not sure how to say it.

"And? What, Daniel?" Jack was clearly getting annoyed by Daniel's hesitation.

"You brought me out here to spend time alone with me," Daniel reasoned out loud. "You have barely wanted to be in the same room as me since I came back to Earth. Sam and Teal'c keep insisting that you and I are close friends, but this is the first time I've seen any interest from you. At first I thought it was because something had happened just before I ascended. Maybe we'd had a falling out, or we were on bad terms when I was dying and you felt guilty or something. Now I'm wondering if you didn't have some other reason for avoiding me."

Jack's eyes were fixed on Daniel, but he had a carefully blank expression on his face. Daniel took that to mean that he was on the right track. "That memory yesterday, of the two of us on your couch? I felt like I was missing something, some piece of it was still just out of my reach. And the careful way you've avoided elaborating on that particular memory tells me a lot. I think the rest of it came to me last night."

Jack still wasn't saying anything. Daniel waited a moment, then sighed. "We kissed," he stated bluntly. "I'm sure of it. Now the question for you is, was it a onetime thing, or are we more than just friends?"

Jack finally looked away. "I guess that's up to you," he said quietly. "We only ever kissed the one time."

"So it was a new development. Then soon after that was when I ascended. We never got a chance to figure it out."

Jack nodded but didn't say anything.

Daniel's attention was caught by a tugging on Jack's line. "Hey, I think you caught something," he pointed.

Jack snapped back into focus and worked to reel in whatever he had caught. Daniel watched him for a moment, then got up and headed back toward camp. He needed time to process all of this. He felt like he still didn't know Jack very well, but his subconscious obviously remembered him. He'd agreed to come back to Earth mainly because of Jack. He felt comfortable around him in a way he still didn't feel around Sam or Teal'c. His subconscious already knew the answer to Daniel's question, but he wasn't sure he could simply accept it.

As Daniel walked through the sparse forest, he thought of every memory he'd recovered so far that had Jack in it. In just about every one, now that Daniel thought about it, there had been this sense of fondness. Something about Jack had always made Daniel feel comfortable, cared for, even.

By the time Daniel got back to camp, he'd made up his mind. He and Jack had always had something, some mutual undercurrent to everything they'd ever said or done with each other. Even with most of his memories still gone, Daniel felt it. It made sense why Jack had been avoiding him. He'd been afraid he'd do something, reveal something that would influence Daniel. He'd brought him out here so that they wouldn't have to worry about Daniel inadvertently revealing something to the wrong person.

By the time Jack got back, Daniel had a fire going. Jack grinned at him and proudly presented Daniel with a large fish that looked vaguely like a shark. "Think we can eat it?" Jack asked.

Daniel studied the creature. "Probably. Give me your knife."

Jack got the cooking pan out and set up the stand over the fire while Daniel gutted and cleaned the fish. They came out with a couple nice filets of white meat, when Daniel laid skin down in the pan. He knew Jack was watching him as he cooked, but he tried to ignore him as much as possible.

The fish turned out to be pretty good eating. Daniel finally forgave Jack for making him get up early to go fishing for it. He sucked the last of the juice off his fingers and noticed Jack watching him from across the fire. "Jack?" Daniel asked, pulling his fingers from his mouth.

"Daniel?" Jack replied, though his voice was a little rough. "I'm gonna go have a swim."

Daniel wanted to make a comment about swimming too soon after eating, but Jack made his escape before Daniel could reply. He watched as Jack shucked his clothes on his way down the beach, finally arriving at the water completely naked. Daniel let himself look. For being nine years older than Daniel, Jack still had a great body. He was too far away to see clearly, but he still watched as Jack's ass disappeared into the water. Shaking his head, Daniel set about cleaning up their cooking pan.

Half an hour later, when Jack still hadn't come out of the water, Daniel gave in to curiosity and went down to find him. "Daniel! You should come in. It's pretty warm," Jack called from a little ways out. Daniel kicked off his shoes and let the surf run over his feet. The water wasn't hot by any standards, but it was surprisingly warm.

Giving in to Jack's waving hand, Daniel shed his clothes. He made sure they were far enough up on the beach to avoid the water, then gingerly made his way into the waves. Jack grinned when Daniel got close. "Nice, huh?" he asked with a grin.

Daniel felt a smile tug at his lips as he nodded. "Yeah." He was a little distracted by the drops of water that clung to Jack's eyelashes and slid from his hair down his temples. Even knowing it was salt water, Daniel found himself wanting to lick them away.

Something must have shown on his face, because the smile slowly faded from Jack's. They bobbed in the water, staring at each other. Daniel felt himself drawn towards the other man, but before he could get too close, Jack shook himself and dove under the water. Daniel felt hands around his calves and had half a second to take a deep breath before Jack yanked him under the waves. He came up sputtering and found Jack laughing at him.

"That was mature," Daniel chuckled. He splashed water at Jack, who turned his head to avoid it.

"Never grow up, Danny," Jack grinned. He splashed water back at Daniel.

When Daniel opened his eyes again, Jack was right in front of him. "Hi," Daniel felt something low in his stomach jerk. Without really thinking about it, he reached up and let his fingers slide along Jack's cheekbone.

Jack's eyes became dark and serious. "Hey," he answered softly. Daniel realized he was slowly drawing them toward the beach. Once their feet were on the ground, Jack moved in closer. "Daniel," he started, but Daniel shook his head.

"I don't have everything back yet, Jack." Daniel's fingers rested at the hinge of Jack's jaw. "I do remember how I've always felt about you, though." He leaned in and placed a soft kiss against Jack's lips, drawing back quickly, wanting to see how Jack would react.

Jack looked conflicted, but hopeful. "Daniel?"

"I'm sure, Jack," Daniel answered.

Jack's hands were suddenly on the sides of Daniel's face, just like he remembered. Jack leaned in and kissed him back, slowly and hungry. With a soft sigh, Daniel let his lips part and when their tongues met, it sent a shock straight to Daniel's groin.

All too soon, Jack pulled away. "This is as far as we've ever gone," he told Daniel, referring to the kiss.

Daniel let the water push him closer and slipped his hands around Jack's waist. Jack's eyes fluttered shut when their erections brushed. "I know," Daniel answered hoarsely. "I want this, if you still do."

Jack's eyes popped open and he glared at Daniel. "Of course I do," he huffed. "Why do you think I've been avoiding you? Seeing you again, it's been driving me nuts."

Daniel kissed him again before pulling away and heading toward the shore. "Come on, Jack," he called behind him. He heard Jack curse and the slosh of water as the other man hurried to catch up with him.

They left their clothes on the beach, barely reaching their tent before Jack pounced, dropping their dripping, salty bodies onto the nearest bedroll. The kisses started out hungry and desperate as Jack ground down against Daniel, but soon, to Daniel's surprise, they became slow and tender. "Stay with me, Danny," Jack whispered against his lips. "I can't lose you again."

It was Daniel's turn to cup Jack's face in his hands. "I don't plan on going anywhere ever again, Jack," he replied gently.

Jack made a small noise and leaned in for another kiss. Just like that, they were back to raw desire. Jack's hands roamed across Daniel's sides before Jack broke their kiss and moved down to suck one of Daniel's nipples into his mouth. Daniel arched up with a groan as Jack knelt up enough to get a hand between them.

When Jack's hand closed over Daniel's cock, jerking him slowly, Daniel fisted the blankets and moaned. "Jack, please," he whimpered, not sure what he was asking for.

Jack moved back up and turned them onto their sides before he kissed him again. "There's so many things I want us to do, that I want to do _to_ you, Daniel," he told him between kisses. "But we'll have time for all of that. Right now…" he trailed off and lined their cocks up so he could take both of them in his hand.

"Ngh," Daniel replied articulately.

"God," Jack groaned. He kissed Daniel again as his hand sped up, jerking both of them hard and fast.

With Jack's mouth on his and their erections pressed together, it didn't take Daniel long before he came with a shuddering moan. Jack kept going with a quiet whimper, using Daniel's come to slick up both their cocks. "Daniel," Jack breathed. Daniel had just enough time to open his eyes before Jack's fell shut. Daniel watched Jack's face as he came, and it was beautiful.

Panting, Jack let go and they held each other as they caught their breaths. Finally Jack shifted enough to reach for something they could use to wipe up. Locating a pack, he pulled out a pair of boxers and gently cleaned both of them. Daniel watched him through half closed eyes.

"I could have missed this," he said softly.

Jack tossed the boxers away and snuggled in close. "Missed what?" he asked, slowly stroking Daniel's cheek. The tenderness of the gesture made Daniel's chest tighten.

"You," Daniel replied. "Us. This. Would we ever have found each other again if…"

Jack cut him off with a kiss. "Don't think about it, Daniel," he ordered. "The point is that it did happen. You and I are right here, all alone for a whole nother day. Let's enjoy it."

Daniel nodded and pulled Jack close, burying his face in Jack's neck. This was the reason he came back, he was sure. The real, selfish reason that had nothing to do with the Right Thing, or with saving the galaxy. This man in his arms was the real reason, and Daniel just had to be grateful that they'd found each other again.


End file.
